Beginnings and Endings

Moving forward with my edible landscaping plans required, in my mind, removing five overgrown trees that were originally planted as a hedge. They were  close together and when the previous owner wanted to sell, they cut off the bottom branches so they looked more tree-like. It always felt like the northwest corner of our yard was blocked by these trees and indeed the entire corner had become an area overgrown with brambles and various “weeds” in the summer.

I wanted to “liberate” a white pine and make a magnificent magnolia tree more visible as well as a hemlock tree. I thought about this for two years. I found exactly the right person to help me.

But my beginnings were endings to my ten -year -old daughter. She was bereft that I cut down any tree. She is angry at me. She has said I “killed” everything that matters to her. This is a girl who wrote about Julia Butterfly Hill as her heroine. Julia Butterfly Hill wrote a book, The Legacy of Luna. Our dog is named Luna. My sixteen- year- old, who embraces change with the same enthusiasm that my daughter distrusts it said wryly, “she’s a pre-teen.”

I have no words to comfort my daughter. I tell her I understand, this was planned for years…. BLAH BLAH  BLAH is what she hears I think. I have the same impulses as she. It took me five years of living on this land to even get to this place. What to my daughter is things left as they should be, to my neighbors probably resembles a neglected yard.

I found comfort though in the first issue of a new magazine called Taproot. In it is an article by Ben Hewitt entitled ,”Something Borrowed.” In the end we are all just borrowing this land. We will pass on as will our children, our homes may crumble, be rebuilt, who knows? But then he says, “If any of this sounds depressing, know that it comforts me; I do not want the burden of the knowledge that my mark on this land is permanent.”

And so, I begin here.



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